Ride of My Life

I was never getting married, but twenty-nine years ago, right about now, I did.  It was a good decision, but not one I would have made. Thank God he knew it was the correct direction.

I think about that often, how life intervenes and tosses you onto another path without warning. How that event or life altering moment just appears out of nowhere and heads you off in an entirely different direction.

At the time you find it annoying or distressing or even cataclysmic, but with distance you can look back and see the order of things. It is the old “tragedy plus time equals comedy” with many of us having to say, “too soon?”  as we find the humor in it.

Perhaps it is all comedy as there is another saying, “If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.” Oh so very true, but we little ego driven meat puppets believe we are holding the reins. As I have aged and learned and read and studied, I realize I have never been the driver.

I lucked out with that goofy guy I married. He had the unbearable lightness of being and always knew that things would work out – you just had to stay on the ride. You had to help the ride along, but if you stayed the course and you did not attach to the outcomes at some point things would be okay. He always said that he was the luckiest guy in the world and if you could choose between lucky and rich, always choose lucky.

He never appeared to hold a grudge (except for one big one that he perceived harmed his business, but he ultimately got over that one too) nor did he spend anytime on things that happened in the past. I found it annoying at first because I so wanted him to see “the truth” about events and people. He just would not waste his time on other’s frailties and failings. That was their problem, and he had things to do.

In a way, I married my mother. Two optimists that chose to see the world as working in their favor and yet owing them nothing. They chose joy and laughter and kindness. Both ascribed to the belief that it was a waste of time to contemplate “might have beens” because they had not happened so why waste any future moments when you could be creating something new.

My life was forever altered on that October day in 1996. A journey I could never have imagined became one filled with stories not to be believed and places I never thought I would see. I got to go on the ride for twenty-six years with him and it continues to be my life every day.

Take the chance. Find the laughter. Enjoy – oh please – enjoy the ride.